Some pals and I in a public house Were playing dominoes last night When all of a sudden in the potman rushed With a face just like a kite “What’s up?” says Brown, “Have you seen your Aunt? Have you seen your Aunt Maria?” “Aunt Maria be blowed”, says he “The bloomin’ pub’s on fire” “What’s that?” says Brown, “What a bit of luck” “What a bit of luck”, shouts he “Down in the cellar with a fire on top We’ll have a good ol’ spree” So we all went down with good ol’ Brown And beer we couldn’t miss And we hadn’t been ten minutes there Before we were like this Oh, there was Brown, upside down Knocking back the whiskey on the floor “Booze! Booze!” the firemen cried As they came a-knocking at the door “Don’t let ‘em in till it’s all mopped up” Someone shouted, “MacIntyre!” And we all got blue-blind paralytic drunk When the Old Dun Cow caught fire Old Johnson rushed to the port wine tub And gave it just a few hard knocks He started taking off his pantaloons Likewise his shoes and socks “Hold on!” says Snoops, “If you wanna wash yer feet There’s a tub of four ale here Don’t dip your trotters in the port wine tub When we’ve still got some old stale beer” Just then there came such an awful crash Half the bloomin’ roof gave way We was run with the firemen’s hose But still we were all gay We got some sacks and some old tin tacks And bunged ourselves inside And we got drinking good old scotch ‘Til we was bleary eyed Oh, there was Brown, upside down Knocking back the whiskey on the floor “Booze! Booze!” the firemen cried As they came a-knocking at the door “Don’t let ‘em in till it’s all mopped up” Someone shouted, “MacIntyre!” And we all got blue-blind paralytic drunk When the Old Dun Cow caught fire